• Me: Oh, hey whoa, this shower is occupied.
• Spider: Omg man I didn't see you there.
• Me: We cool?
• Spider: Yeah, yeah, we're cool. I'm just coming down to scope out the tub.
• Me: Oh, that's legit. Hey, you might wanna move over some--you're descending right into the shower stream and I don't want you to drown.
• Spider: Hey thanks, bud. I'll be careful.
• Me: So...can I get out now?
• Spider: Sure, sure! Sorry I'll just move over here.
• Me: Thanks. You have a nice night. Don't come into my bedroom, okay?
• Spider: Nah, that's your space. We're cool. Have a great evening.

eqocentric:

this got so many notes what

thedorkmistress:

corgisandboobs:

jennibrown-ben-plumm:

Minas Tirith Sandcastle 

A Minas

Tirith

Sand

Castle

So goes Denethor, son of Ecthelion.

*throws crab off the top*

this is amazing

Abortion seems to be the only medical procedure that people want to deny you based on how you got in that situation.

Drove drunk, got in an accident and need an organ transplant? No problem.

Messing around with a gun, accidentally shoot yourself in the leg and need surgery? Of course.

Smoke tobacco for most of your life and need treatment for lung cancer? Yep.

Climb a tree, fall out and break your leg? We’ll fix that right up.

Have sex and get pregnant when you don’t want to be? YOU GOT YOURSELF INTO THIS SITUATION AND YOU DESERVE NO MEDICAL HELP OR COMPASSION! THIS IS YOUR FAULT AND YOU WILL DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES!

Worry About Your Own Uterus:   (via veruca-assault)

“Worry about your own uterus” wise  wise words.

(via triplash)

ever-so-plucky:

nooowestayandgetcaught:

raglemuffins:

zahhakward:

fasntnig:

just a little southeast of Phoenix, AZ, this is how the Outback Steakhouse restaurants line up.

i’d hate to be staying at a hotel right in the middle of delicious steak pentagram OH WAIT

The road that runs through is called Superstition Freeway omg

LOL It’s a demon trap made of Outback Steakhouses 

WHAT IS IN THE CENTER

WHAT IS IN THE CENTER

IS THAT A GATE TO HELL

Yes.